Hangin with "Freaks and Geeks", RSVP PSP - find out what it means to me, Super Downsize me - A Weekday Review Round-up...

Greetings people of earth!
Yes, I know I've been away longer than a conversation with Stephen Hawking, but I've been busy. What's important is that we are here now, so enjoy my latest offerings. Here we go...

DVD's:

Freaks and Geeks: The entire series

Hot digitty damn this set is the best thing since women's boobs! Really, I think this show was one of the most unappreciated shows that ever hit the airwaves. I don't know how many of you have watched the show, or even heard of it for that matter, but this is a must see box set! If after watching a couple of episode you find you still don't like it...THEN I'M PULLING YOUR FEEDING TUBE!!! Eww, I think I made the baby Jesus cry with that one? SOWWY!

The show is set in the midst of 1980. Being an adult who grew up during this magical time I can appreciate all of the references and music that is played throughout the series. The title of the show pretty much sums up what the show is about. The "Geeks" are freshmen who long to be accepted as "cool" by their fellow classmen, but just can't cut it. The "Freaks" are your basic group of heathens, or so you think. You know, the kids with the denim jackets and hard rock t-shirts. I don't know what ad they placed when casting for this show, but every character is PERFECT! You can instantly think of someone you went to high school with that either made you miserable or was your buddy when you watch this show.

The main geek kid is named Sam Weir and he is pretty much the unappointed leader of the geeks. This kid is mucho scrawny and almost looks like he could pass for a girl. His two best buds are Bill Haverchuck and Neil Whateverhislastnameis. Bill is a tall kid who has a grown out buzz cut, wears glasses so thick he can see the future and has a face that looks like he just ain't right. Sad part is, even though he exaggerates his features, they don't do much to change his look. He really does look like he might be slow. The other bestest friend is Neil. Neil is a short chubby faced Jewish kid. He has a nasty head of curly black hair (cut in a fashion only managers at Big LOTS! still wear) and always wears a sweater vest. They are all into science fiction (especially Star Wars) and love comedy flicks. They are constantly quoting from Airplane! and the Jerk. Thing is, it's actually funny to hear their banter. I can't speak for all of you who are in denial, but this reminded me a lot of my friends from school. Shit, it reminds me of some of the friends i even have now. NOTE TO SELF: get new friends.

The "Freaks" are a awesome little bunch as well. Sam has a sister named Lindsay Weir and in the pilot episode she tries to fit in with the "Freaks" in an attempt to rebel and find herself. Prior to trying to fit in with the hooligans she was a prize student and even participated in "The Mathletes". For reasons that aren't really clear she denounces that whole scene and blends in with the "Freaks". What's great about her falling into their social circle is she is their voice of reason AND you start to find out that these kids aren't bad at all, they just have shitty starts in life and have been marked losers by either teachers or their own family. Even Lindsay's parents call them "burn outs" without really meeting them. The Freak posse consists of Daniel Desario, Kim Kelly, Ken Theyneverreallygivehislastname and Nick Andopolis (or something). Daniel is played by James Franco, who is most recognized as Harry Osborne in the Spider-man flicks, and he's your basic greasy haired, emaciated looking, dirty looking clothes wearing "burn out". As the series moves on you find he knows he's a loser, but he's got heart, holmes! His girlfriend Kim is your typical white trash...she even drives a cancer rusted Gremlin! Ken is a monotone voiced teenager with a nappy head of hair and wicked mutton chop sideburns. He rarely says anything that isn't sarcastic. Nick! WHEW! Nick is this tall kid who is a major pot head and LOVES playing the drums. His dream is to be a famous drummer and he takes pride in his 28 piece drum set.

The set is pretty much 18 hours long so I can't really get into any of the stories. I can tell you that even though it's a coming of age style show, it isn't preachy or over dramatic like the Wonder Years tended to be. Again, you will find yourself laughing at some of the situations because they really hit close to home. I wish this box set had arms and legs, then I'd walk it up the aisle and marry it! That's how much I love this fucking show! Ya heard.

Freaks and Geeks - *****stars! A first on this site!


Game Systems:

Sony PSP

When I first got this show on the road I talked about my desire to get me a new Sony PSP. Well my friends...MISSION ACCOMPLISHED! Sure the trail leading to my goal wasn't easy, but I got it damn you! I got it! TOP OF THE WORLD MA!

Originally I had intended to reserve my beloved PSP at my local gameshop. This was during the time when I was delirious with pain from the Devil twisting his little toe in my ear. I had made many-o phone call to confirm that I could reserve my PSP because surely they were going to be hotter than a Jerry Curl in the summer. When I go to the shop to sing my name to the RSVP list the little bastard behind the counter smugly tells me, "Sorry. We stopped taking names as of this morning". The next thing I knew my fingers were sore because I made a fist so tight after hearing his smug little answer I think I hear a few of them crack! "Um...I called yesterday and they said it wouldn't problem reserving one today?" (I had really called too)
"Yeah, well we got an e-mail this morning saying we aren't doing that anymore. Sorry"
It's about this time that I notice the bastard looks like that cartoon character "The Critic" and was about a foot and a half smaller than me. My sight was getting blurry with rage and the pain in my ear didn't help me out any either.
"I see. Do you think you could just add my name to the bottom of the list? I mean, I called yesterday and it's only one more name?"
"PSSH! Uh...NO! I don't think so. Sorry"
It took a few seconds to realize that this fucker had scoffed at me and when it hit, it hit like a semi truck.
"...fffFFFFUUUCK!!!" I yell out loud like I was the Mexican Hulk!
"ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME!? I JUST CALLED YESTERDAY! THIS IS BULLSHIT!!!"
I really don't know what kept me from leaping the counter like a Werewolf and smashing his face into the counter? But it wasn't until I was in my car that I realized I hadn't. The goocher was, when I had my mini break down all The Critic could do was shrug his shoulders and say sorry in a tone that was told me he loved having the power to deny me my PSP. I was in a fog of rage when I walked out of there. I still fantasize about kicking that fuckers guts out.

I finally realized that I had to find a store that was selling them and pull the ultimate geek/loser move and stand in line at some funky hour in the morning. The other challenge would be location. Where would be a good spot to score the unscorable? TARGET! Not just any Target, but the Target in the ghetto! Yes, dammit it just might work! That was my plan and I was sticking to it!

6am on the day of release I drive up to the Ghetto Target in Santa Ana, or what could easily referred to as "Little Mexico"! Trust me, this part of town practically smelled like bean burrito's and I wasn't about to pass up the opportunity to take advantage of this situation. When I pull into the parking lot all I see is some hobo wrapped in a blanket at the front of the store? A slight panic shot a drip of pee pee out of the ole bald bishop but I parked anyway. Perhaps this store didn't get a shipment after all?! Surely there had to be a posting or something notifying customers if that were the case. As I get closer to the front doors I notice that the hobo is playing a gameboy. Silly bastard! He wasn't a hobo at all! Just some guy who spent the night in front of the store so he could get a PSP. Around 7:30 there are only 5 of us waiting to get our goods and by 8am there were 11. At first I felt like a total a-hole for waiting in line at 6am, but then I realized I wasn't the guy who spent the night and it was better to be safe than sorry.

When the gates of heaven open I casually walk (but run in my mind) to the electronics counter and claim my reward. I couldn't believe it all worked according to plan!

I couldn't even wait to get to the office before I opened it up, I had to do it right there in my trusty G-ride! As I slowly unpack everything a car pulls up next to me and I hear this punk ass kid say, "YEAH! They have to have them still! This fucker here is already playing his!" It was with this statement I looked up in shame like I got caught whacking off and then shook my fist at him.

WOW! I don't even know how to begin to describe the beauty of the PSP! Remember when we were growing up and the Odyssey system was THE system to have?! All it was was some blocky graphics and you had to play with clunky controllers. Not only was this the most amazing machine I've ever seen, but it made me feel old. I can't believe the way technology has progressed!? When you see this machine you can't help but think that it's almost surreal that these things are soon to be the norm with kids today! Fuckers.

The PSP has a 4.somthing widescreen screen that when playing a movie is better than most TV's we've seen in peoples homes. It can also be used as an MP3 player, holds JPEG files for viewing pictures, plays mini DVD style movies and plays video games that are equal to a PS2. The games I picked up were "Darkstalkers" and "Lumines". These are the best looking games I've ever seen. My only gripe is that the machine comes in this shiny plastic casing that looks like a crime scene when your done playing it. They provide a wipe cloth for it, but I can't stand fingerprints and didn't touch it for almost a full day because it was so pretty I didn't want to ruin it. Once I got over my neurosis it was gaming heaven from then on. At $250 it's not the cheapest system, and I think it's way to sophisticated for the wee chillins, but it is well worth the price! If the Freaks and Geeks box set turns down my marriage proposal I think I'll marry the PSP instead!

Sony PSP- *****stars! It's so good you want to slap it and call it your wife!

Jobs:

Getting Down Sized

I don't even know how to start with this one? For the people out there who aren't too familiar with the term "down sized" it pretty much means it's what happens when the company you work for treats you like a big juicy fart...and lets you go! Yes that's right, I was given notice that my position here in corporate America was being eliminated. Here's how I found out.

I spent most of the weekend caught up in drink and an occasional BT. When you indulge in such weekends as these you start to remember how many vacation and sick days you have. Well I was in the shower Monday when this useful information popped into my head. It was then that I realized that maybe I was feeling a little ill and it wouldn't be wise for me to go into the office. Turns out my "ailment" would last until Tuesday too. While I was in the middle of that dream where I run real fast then take a small leap forward to start flying that my cell phone rings and wakes me up. I turn off the ringer and try to get back to being airborne. This was pretty much useless and I got out of bed, besides it was after 12pm anyway.

A little bit after I waddle out of bed I get a call from my buddy I work with telling me that we got the axe and if anyone called besides her to let me know. Wiping the sleep out of my eyes I finally realize what she just said.
"WHAT?! We got fired!"
"Yeah, they said they were eliminating our positions and we are all being let go!"
"Shit, I guess it's a good thing I was off today then? Otherwise I'd be miserable AND at work." She proceeds to fill me in on some of the details and for some reason I wasn't really bummed to lose my job. It almost felt like I was being set free and some of the stress I felt went away.

Later on I finally get a call from our regional manager in the home office who we refer to as "the Troll". She is this short lady who had a head the size of a Mardi Gras puppet and a trollish face. She is sweet as sugar though and we always got along famously. I could tell she was nervous by the tone in her voice and I almost giggled when I had to act like I was just hearing the news for the first time. I threw in a few "man, this sucks" and "I can't believe it" nuggets for show but I really didn't care. She tried her best to be nice about it, but I could tell some of it was scripted by home office. My favorite part was when she told me "The company has invested quite a bit of money into their technological upgrades and even though they have had to make cut backs in 90% of their offices, they hope that it will be worth it in the future." It as at this point I chimed in with, "Trolly McTrolltroll, just a little word of advice if I may? You really shouldn't tell the person your calling up to give the boot that the company hopes to make a ton of cash as a result of you being downsized. Call me cuckoo, but I know for myself the future earnings of the company is no where near as important at wondering where my future earnings are going to come from. As a matter of fact, finding out I won't be working for the company might just effect my loyalty too? But that's just me talking"
"...oh...um...yeah, I'm sorry. I didn't mean it to sound like that?"
"Perfectly ok. Well thanks for letting me know, I appreciate you calling me yourself. Yeah...um...guess I'll see you later?"

There was other mumbo jumbo involved in the conversation but the only important part was that my last day would be Oct. 21st so this was another reason why I wasn't freaking out about getting the boot.

Truth be told, I hate my job. I've been in the insurance business for 10 years and have never had any interest in it. I've thought about trying something new, but it's hard looking for a job when your at work?! Not to mention it was more of a daydream than something I would ever pursue. Now I have a kick in the ass and 7 months to apply for something new, something that might actually interest me or fool me into thinking I was interested in it. I hope this turns out to be a blessing and actually makes my day a little more enjoyable than the days I spend having my soul sucked dry of any pleasure and interest by corporate America. If not, then I'll just go back to insurance...to continue going prematurely grey and balding from stress. WHEEE!

What really gets me heated about this whole thing is knowing that I have to revise my resume so I can send it out. That's not even so bad, what sucks more than that is I have to go to interviews now! I HATE fucking interviewing! I loathe having to dress up and have one on one's with some stranger so I can sell myself to them. It's a fucking drag. Now I have to drop some lbs (because jobs are like relationships, once you've been with them for a few years you let yourself go and start to look schlubby) and get out my "dress" clothes. It's a good thing I'm a handsome motherfucker or else I might have run into some problems!

We'll see how it goes.

Getting Downsized- "0"stars! c'mon, even one star is too much!


DJB